Dear Mr. Molyneux:

As hard as we strive for editorial accuracy here at FDR Liberated, I’ve recently discovered that we have been consistently misrepresenting your views on child abuse.

All along, I’ve said that in your view any child raised by parents who believe in some form of government or religion was abused. Then I heard FDR1633—How Many Children Are Abused? and realized we had completely misrepresented your point of view.

Of course, you didn’t actually answer the question as expected. You didn’t give a number. Or percent. I realize now it was shallow of me to expect that an 11-minute podcast that starts with the question “How many?” would actually provide some kind of number!

Because now I understand that you’ve given us something much better than that. We now have a list of things that will be considered abusive 100 years from now—based on your unique ability to project your mind into the future and look back at us digging in the dirt. Now we won’t have to rely on anything arcane and outmoded like research. Thanks to your vision, we have something much, much better.

As I understand it, your complete list (from the future) includes:

  • Parents, in general.
  • Philosophers, who are the reason why parents are abusive. Since philosophers failed to create a rational system of ethics, the “vast majority” of parents rely on aggression and/or emotional neglect, such as withdrawal of affection, to abuse their children into behaving. (Why, oh why isn’t the public racing to embrace UPB? It’s right there in front of you, people!)
  • Religious instruction of any kind.
  • All public schools.
  • The media—those “lickspittle toadies” who live only to serve those in power.
  • Academia—who is apparently more focused on figuring out the last episode of “Lost” than giving parents the tools they need. (Damn you, Academia! Let us each interpret the meaning of “Lost” for ourselves!)
  • And then my favorite entry, when you say at the end: “The list could go on and on…”

Well, of course it can. Because we already know the magic number of abused children appears to be…drumroll…wait for it…100%.

When that jukebox-jury of child abuse weighs in 100 years from now, they will declare that not only parents but also virtually anything that touched a child in this century (except for FreeDomain Radio) was abusive.

FDR Liberated regrets its previous misrepresentation of Molyneux’s theories on abuse.